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Released in 1997, when Harris was just 21 years old and had not yet been in a dating relationship, "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" discusses the problems with contemporary "recreational dating" and presents "biblical courtship" as an alternative.In his book, Harris also urges Christian singles to commit to "purposeful singleness," as romantic relationships should exist only as a means to preparing for marriage The book quickly became a staple among the Christian community, selling over 800,000 copies nationwide.

And so when we try to overly control our own lives or overly control other people's lives, I think we end up harming people.

Harris articulates his theory of dating and courtship in three resources: the initial article for , “Dating Problems, Courtship Solutions,” “I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance,” and the sequel, “Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship.” Harris insists his books are not a formula for the perfect relationship, but this claim amounts to empty hedging against the charge of legalism.

Harris’s writings provides a robust framework for why dating is the problem and courtship the solution.

In this, I suspect that they are no different than the rest of us.

But evangelicals also love to hate their fads, especially when they prove hollow.

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It’s fine for a 22-year-old to go out with an 18-year-old.